Bummer Heights High

Snow Day yesterday...pretty bad ass. How did Indiana students celebrate? You guessed it, by putting kegs in the snow and ripping it. A brief recap for those of you that missed out.

Wednesday, January 28th

11:00- Woke up. Class canceled til noon woo hoo! Woke up roommates, corralled all shackers orchestrated rides, and began drinking.

Noon: Class canceled all fucking day! Resin hits, Big Red, 2 kegs, bbm everyone, start taking celebratory shots.

1:00: Flip cup in 8 inches of snow, while IU employees shovel our sidewalk, is it wrong of me to laugh.

2:00: The kegs are gone but Dick drives to the frat and steals another one! TFM Dick. I believe we all just threw snowballs at McBroom, and Steve just played the Jock Jams megamix for the seventh time.

3:00: Some how every Senior that I have befriended in college is now crammed in a 40 square foot room at Sigma Chi singing Celine Deon...nice.

4:00: We are all blacked out now at Kilroy's, I wonder if this is what IU had in mind.

7:00: Still at Kilroys

7:18: I took a break from the action to grab a slim 2 at JJs...however I returned to Kilroys to consume it.

I'm not entirely sure what happened from about 8 to 12:30, but when I came out of my black out I had been asked to a formal and I was at Sports wearing a "Hey it's my birthday shirt!" Then when I looked down at Jake and he gave me a shot and said Happy Birthday, I realized that it was now indeed January 29th! Nice!

12:36: Birdman, Jake, and Hunter are on some sort of mission and my phone keeps ringing, I think I'm supposed to go home.

12:49: Run into Bluebird to tell Clayton Anderson that he rocks.

12:57: So this is what Brothers is...

1:30: In bed, tomorrow is a big day...

See you all at Bears, and a big high five to the Greek Seniors who made yesterday awesome, and to IU for cancelling class!

uhh, um, ok see ya

Freshman year of college I went up to Purdue for the equivalent of what was their bid week. I went to my buddies dorm room and saw in his closet that he had this weird new axe soap called snake skin. He said he only used it after he committed a deplorable sex act with someone regrettable, because he felt that like a snake he could shed his skin (or shame) and start anew.

Well I have a feeling that lots of Freshman girls are feeling that way right about now. Bid week is and always has been one of the most comical times of year for a guy, but I'm sure that amidst my laughter there are several girls calling home crying to their mothers because they were just devirginized by some asshole in ATO. But this year it seemed as if the joke was on me.

As I would drunkenly stumble up to a Freshman and proudly declare my senior status, it was as if I had just admitted to being a registered sex offender. Apparently it is no longer cool to flirt with the elder statesmen of the crowd. No worries, I'll just go to Kilroy's and strike out with the usual suspects and then wake up on my shitty futon in the morning with all of my clothes on staring blankly at an old gossip girl rerun or HBO late night on demand, that I had thrown on in my blackout.

-End subtle rant about being old-

So the Little 5 pairings are out and I am not surprised. I am a bit disappointed in the lack of controversy. There didn't seem to be much of a wild card this year, it seems like everything is as it should be. The tiny stunt pulled by the Kappas would be no worse than a C Misdemeanor in a social court. But the real question is what shit ass rap act is AEPi bringing to town this year? I'm sorry was that rude.
My apologies to Eric Kramer and Ben Smith, for I love you both dearly.

As the snow melts and I spiral deeper and deeper into my denial that college is nearing its conclusion, I say that this will not be a traditional Shakespearean five act play with the climax in act 3...o no. This is going to be the last 20 minutes of The Departed...Who will be standing with me when the smoke clears?